Who the Frag Am I?

February 26, 2010

On the Love of Change

Filed under: Autism — wtfmi @ 10:09 pm

One of the things that initially convinced me that there was no way I could possibly be autistic is the fact that I really like change. I’d heard that people with autism are resistant to change, but I embrace it — so that couldn’t possibly be me, right?

But I mentioned this one day to my husband … and he snorted.

“You really think you like change? You hate it!”

“What do you mean?” I asked. “You’re the one who hates it. You never want to move, but I love looking at new apartments. You get freaked out when your karate class schedule changes!”

“We’re not talking about me,” he answered. “I know I hate change. But so do you. You won’t even go with me to new restaurants! It’s always Outback or the Greek place.”

I shrugged. “I know what I want is all. Those places are comfortable. But what about moving? That’s a huge change, and you know how much I enjoy it.”

“What do you enjoy about it? Do you like packing all our stuff or lifting the heavy boxes or waiting for the application to clear or worrying about being homeless if things don’t all come together?”

“No,” I said. “All those things suck. But-”

He smirked at me. “So what do you like about it?”

“Well … I like looking at places. I like choosing one. I like figuring out where our stuff will go and unpacking everything in a clean new place.”

“How would you feel if you had to move without having time to plan everything out?”

I shook my head. “That would really suck. I’d hate that.”

“Well there you go. You like spreadsheets. You like maps. You like planning. You like having control over your environment. But you don’t like change.” He paused. “And that’s okay with me. I just wish you’d try new restaurants sometimes.”

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